Do you feel anxious about writing your own wedding vows? Do you feel hopeless and without any creativity?
That’s one completely expected scenario. Every bride-to-be feels uncomfortable in this situation. You’re willing to put your whole love life into words. You are going to remember the times of joy as well as some bad times. All the memories you made with the love of your life will wake up for a moment.
But what if I told you it’s not that hard at all?
In this article, we’ll guide you through all the steps you need to take. Follow them and you’ll have stunning vows in no time! Even if you’re not feeling like a wordsmith.
Although some creativity may help, writing is a technical task. Once you have the tips and how-tos, it’s way easier than expected.
Read on to learn how to write wedding vows for her that will blow his mind!
Don’t wait for the last moment
Waiting for the night before the wedding ceremony isn’t a perfect time for creative writing. Ideally, you should think about this at least one month before the wedding day.
Like this, you’ll have enough time to write it without any pressure. Also, you’ll have enough room for feedback or improvements. It’s okay to share your vows with your best friend. A fresh pair of eyes can see what you didn’t see. Maybe something sounds odd, or you missed a point.
Make it short and strong
The perfect length for romantic wedding vows is 5 to 10 sentences. You don’t need to write a love letter here or speak about life’s mysteries.
Unless you’re a poet or a professional writer, it’s nearly impossible to write an interesting 10-minute speech. The last thing you want is your guests to fall asleep or start scrolling through a phone during the vows.
Say what you (really) mean
You’ve probably heard vows like:
“I’ll treat you like a god for the rest of our lives”,
“Let me worship the ground you walk on until the final days of our lives”,
And so on.
But do you think these are real? Are you going to keep these promises?
Well, not really.
The point is to express your true feelings and turn them into words. So for this part, it’s enough to be yourself. Write the way you speak. Be yourself.
There’s no point in exaggerating. It will sound cheesy and uniform.
You can promise to be the closest friend, a devoted wife, and to love with the whole heart. Yet the emotion will be seen only if you’re saying the truth.
Define a common format and style
Imagine this – you’re standing side by side with your soon to be husband. The officiant is next to you, and all the friends and family are watching. You’re about to say your marriage vows.
You opt for old school traditional wedding vows. Or the serious religious wedding vows.
The whole crowd is emotionally touched, and it’s the time for his vows.
He, on the other hand, decides to pick funny wedding vows. There is a bit of romance, some inside jokes, and a silly situation.
Doesn’t fit well into the concept, right?
That’s the reason why you need to decide your preferable style, tone, and format. Your two vows should be similar or complement each others’. One can’t speak about God and eternity, while the other is making a romantic comedy sitcom.
You can solve this situation by finding some wedding vow examples. Like this, you’ll get familiar with different styles and formats. This is another reason why you can’t wait for the last time. Don’t forget to include creating vows in the wedding planning checklist!
Another good advice is to talk with your officiant. Introduce your plan, and see how it fits in the whole ceremony.
Answer those questions
In case you run out of ideas, answering some questions may help.
- When was the first time you met your true love?
- How did your soulmate turn you into a better person?
- What do you adore about your loved one?
- What’s your favorite love song and what does it say?
As soon as you answer, you’ll have the inspiration for vows as well. You crossed many paths together, yet this is just a part of your life. Think of the moments you’ve spent together and reflect on them.
Limit inside jokes and personal details
An honest wedding vow should be written with an open heart. Yet some tend to cross the line.
Real wedding vows should be intimate but at the same time appropriate for all your guests. We understand that life throws numerous funny, witty, or silly situations. But if all your guests didn’t witness all that, which is usually the case, they won’t get the point.
The good case practice is to put yourself to a guest’s shoes. Think of a family member or relative. If the vows are okay for them, you’re on point.
Don’t bother memorizing your vows – write them down
You’re not at school and this is not an exam. Once you create the vows, feel free to write them down, so you can read it out.
And by writing, we don’t mean typing on your phone. Have your vows handwritten on a piece of paper. It’s as romantic as it gets.
Practice your body language and intonation
When the writing is finished, you’re almost done. Yet there’s one more thing you need to do.
As wedding vows are a kind of presentation, your public speaking skills should be practiced. Your voice needs to sound flawless.
And by that, we don’t mean going too far and overly stressing. It’s enough to read your vows out loud a few times. Practice your intonation and don’t be afraid to make pauses during the speech.
Pauses should be made between certain segments, to add value and emotion. If you read everything in one breath, it won’t sound good enough.
Record what you’re saying during this practice. Then listen to your voice and be honest with the critique.
Bonus tip – phrases and words to get the inspiration going
Making your vows doesn’t mean you should restrict yourself from using some of the known phrases. They are usually powerful enough, and that’s the reason why you’ll find them in many real-life sample wedding vows.
A good source of inspiration comes from romantic quotes. Check your favorite romance writer or poets and you’ll immediately burst with inspiration.
And for the end, here is a list of commonly used phrases you can steal and make your vows stunning:
- “I look forward to spending the rest of my life with you, my best friend”
- “I will love and honor you all the days of my life”
- “…in times of joy and in times of sorrow…”
- “I promise to always be your biggest fan…”
- “I met the love of my life in you”
- “…to make you smile for the rest of your life”
- “As a sign of my love for you…”
- “you bring me unending happiness”